Resolving To Help

Name: Elizabeth Perry
About You: I can really do no better than to point to my ten things i assume you know about me post. I'd like to have at least one resolution/goal for each of those facets of me for 2011, so that I can feel confident I am nourishing all the aspects of self which are most important to me.

Three things you'd like to change about yourself:

1. I'd like to stop having massive deadline fail in my life.


2. I'd like to stop being so stressed about money. Hopefully, getting a job when I graduate in May will help with that, because a large portion of my stress around that is due to being dependent on my family to support me.


3. I'd like to stop being so bewildered by intrapersonal relationships. I recently tripped and fell into dating someone (eeeee!) and I want to feel comfortable in that relationship and understand what's going on in it instead of guessing.

Resolutions that you've made in the past:

2007

1. Write 500 words a day — not for word count, not as something that can be "made up" by skipping a day and writing 1000 the next, just for the sake of writing them.
2. Keep going to the gym five times a week (alternatively, get back into dance classes).
3. Make actual progress in therapy.
3a. Keep what friendships I have going and reach out to some people I've lost and shouldn't have.
4. Get a job.
5. Remember that it is never as bad as I think it is.

2008

1. Finish A Bargain for Salvation and submit it to at least 1 publisher.
2. Go back to school; get the GPA up to 2.5 when there.
3. Make three new friends in reasonable proximity to my home.
3a. Reconnecting with old friends counts as half a new friend.
3b. Make sure to take solitude for myself when I need it.
4. Go to the gym four times a week. Dance classes count as a gym visit. Pilates classes count as 1.5 visits.
5. Make a budget and stick to it; save enough for first, last, and security on my own apartment.
6. Work hard in therapy, even when it hurts. Keep communicating with Dr. L about the process. Don't lie in sessions.

2009

1. Call out misogyny and sexism when and where I see it.
2. Write every day and keep track of my daily word count.
3. Contribute to fandom, both by volunteering for OTW and creatively.
4. Work hard and honestly in therapy.
5. Save 10% of my income.
6. Go to the gym or a dance/Pilates class four times a week.
7. Maintain a 2.5 GPA.

2010

2009 was kind of a wash for me. A non-year. Non-event-year. Something. I didn't do the resolution thing, and this year I'm backlashing.

Resolutions that you're making this year:
Resolution: Take care of my physical health.
Plan: Get a PCP, OB/GYN (fucking pcos), dentist, psychiatrist (if the PCP won't prescribe my SSRI), who aren't 3+ hours away from where I live. (This is slightly dependent on where I end up living after graduation, but I'm hoping to stay in the same city.)
Keeping track: Monthly check-in posts at resolving.
Endgoal: Knowing who's responsible for what kind of care, making sure that whatever insurance I have covers them, transferring my records from the gazillion practitioners who currently have them in a scattershot fashion, and having gone through at least a baseline session with everyone.
&c.:

Resolution: Commit to a regular activist practice.
Plan: Volunteer at a local women's health clinic as an escort, either through Planned Parenthood or NOW.
Keeping track: Monthly check-in posts at resolving.
Endgoal: Have a standing (preferably monthly) volunteer gig at a clinic.
&c.:

Resolution: Second-draft A Bargain for Salvation and get to the next goddamn novel.
Plan: Complete a second draft of A Bargain for Salvation, choose what novel to write next from the list of six/seven potenials, complete prep elements of whichever novel I choose, have preliminary reading list for research.
Keeping track: Posts on my DW under the writing: statistics tag.
Endgoal: Completed Bargain draft, feeling confident about the next novel.
&c.: Ideally, I'll also write a 30K sequel to Love's the Burning Girl in the 2011 ladiesbigbang.

Resolution: Stay engaged with the OTW and contribute to the org.
Plan: Chair the [redacted] committee.
Keeping track: Monthly committee meetings, monthly all-org meetings, bi-weekly org newsletter.
Endgoal: See below, I guess.
&c.:I've been a part of this org since 2007 and I'm currently feeling burned out and anxiety-ridden about it; I want my joy back. I want to stop feeling upset when emails come in from my colleagues in the org.

Resolution: Keep working on living with depression instead of dying slowly of it.
Plan: Taper off therapy sessions to biweekly at most, preferably monthly.
Keeping track: Therapist (and my checking account)! Entries on my DW under the life: therapy tag.
Endgoal: Fewer therapy sessions, even during my bad period of November-March.
&c.:

Resolution: Balance introversion with socializing.
Plan: Spend time with friends/girlfriend/colleagues at least twice a week. Reach out to old friends from high school I've lost touch with.
Keeping track: Putting dates into my planner in ink.
Endgoal: Standing dates!
&c.: This is going to be hard: there are some weeks when two social things may be too much, and striking a balance between "letting myself off the hook, this is appropriate self-interest" and "get off your ass and just do it" will be hard.

Resolution: Contribute to political discourse!
Plan: Send one email a week to a public official.
Keeping track: Monthly check-ins at resolving.
Endgoal: 52 emails in my Sent box tagged "resolved to ruin or rule".
&c.:

Resolution: Become better-informed about modern race relations.
Plan: Read one book a month on the topic.
Keeping track: goodreads.
Endgoal: 12 books on my nonfiction--race shelf, which currently stands at 0.
&c.:

Resolution: Read for pleasure & chip away at my to-read list.
Plan: Two books a month from my to-read shelf on goodreads.
Keeping track: goodreads reviews.
Endgoal: 26 more books on my read shelf, which is currently at 153.
&c.:

Resolution: Learn some basic programming.
Plan: Install the tools in the OTW volunteers wiki, hang out in the coder's chatroom.
Keeping track: oh god I have no idea. Work with my engineer friend on building something, and make a standing date to hack?
Endgoal: Three commits to the Archive of Our Own gcode by December 31, 2011.
&c.:

Bonus resolutions which are not related to identity axes!

Resolution: I want to (a) be more flexible and (b) have more upper-body strength.
Plan: (a) January-May, take a ballet or aerial class at school; May-December, take Pilates classes at nearest gym to wherever the hell I end up living, (b) Follow the one hundred pushups plan.
Keeping track: Commenting at exercise_every_day with specifics of exercises done.
Endgoal: Being able to place my palms flat on the floor with my knees straight; being able to do one hundred pushups.
&c.:

Resolution: Contribute to charity.
Plan: Donate $10 a month to a different 501(c)3. January: the ACLU. February: Emma Willard School. March: the OTW. April: Planned Parenthood. May: the Seán Curran Company. (more to come!)
Keeping track: Receipts in my files to give to the tax preparer.
Endgoal: $120 tax deduction.
&c.: Anyone have suggestions for places to donate to? The ones on the list already I have a personal connection to, but I'd gladly learn about more!

And the six-month, three-year, five-year, and ten-year plan post will be going up at my journal, probably access-locked, tomorrow!